When was the Last Time You Lost Your Shit?

Yelled at someone, yelled at the dogs, decided the entire universe was against you, and there was no hope.

Okay, it wasn’t that bad.

But I yelled at a customer service person and at the dogs. I wanted to throw my phone at the wall, but they cost way too much just to destroy.

I am ashamed of this behavior. I’m human, and anger is part of the package, AND I can generally bring my vibration back to at least neutral before I get to that kind of anger.

My sister often says that I never get angry.  That’s not true. I find a way back to neutral, or annoyed, or some relatively higher vibration before I get too angry. Anger takes a lot of energy; it erodes trust and can destroy relationships.

Anger is 100% acceptable human emotion. Unless you spew it out all over someone, or some four-legged friend, or you hold on to it until it causes you mental, physical, or emotional harm.

Not feeling the anger, not allowing it to exist, is spiritual bypassing. You may not want to admit that. Not feeling is a trauma response or spiritual bypassing.

It’s ok, even good, to be in the feeling- the anger, the disappointment (in yourself or others), the jealousy, etc. It’s what you do with the feeling that brands it helpful or destructive.

When I look at how I got to this spot today… I’m overly tired, my nervous system is jacked up because of a change in plans that is creating disruptions, there are decisions in the works creating mounds of discomfort, blah, blah- we all have stuff. Today, my stuff took over.

My feelings about a terrible phone system aren’t wrong; they are just out of proportion because of the above. So now what do I do?

1.     I  breathe.

2.     I admit the bad behavior. If I could get the customer service agent back on the phone, I would apologize. Not for him, but for me. Because I’m here to make this a better planet, not to spew anger.  I give the dogs an extra-long hug and say, “I’m sorry, please forgive me.”

3.     I do a short Ho’oponopono ceremony to release the energy and come back into alignment with myself.

4.     Then I take a walk. To release more energy and welcome the ease back into my space.

I was reactive with the dogs, and they didn’t do anything to warrant that. I have to accept what I did and diligently work to not allow it to happen again.

I yelled at a customer service agent about their shitty system and lack of communication when it had nothing to do with him. <Sigh> I can only promise myself I will do better. I will be a better human.

It doesn’t matter how spiritual or enlightened you are. Human is Human.

I’ve worked with some big-name spiritual, enlightened leaders, and they are all Human.

They make mistakes. They have to go back to the basics to reclaim their soul.

There is strength in doing the work. There is growth in doing the work.